When I wrote the first part of this post, I never anticipitated the stream of comments, advice and smiley's that were awaiting me and I didn't expect that there would be a second part because that day was one of those character defining, life altering, choose your path kind of days for me and the constant palpatation and pounding heartbeat weren't a good sign.
I sat across from Ex, hearing him fill me in on his life as it had been in the past 5 months since I left. A mix of emotions were surging through him, I would say, perhaps because I was going through the same damn thing.
A melancholy memory, a happy sigh, a joyful reunion with lost love mixed with an increasing feeling of nausea...my mind is a mess to say the least.
No I don't love you anymore Ex, but yes I do miss you. Yes I think about you often, but no I don't fill my days with thoughts of you and our relationship.
He wants to be friends, I don't think that is even feasible. Friends after a five year relationship? Can that ever be a no-strings attached proposition?
Are you saying there was no intensity, no love, no emotions between us...no Im not saying that retorts the Ex. Well then if all those things existed between us then there can never be a 'we are just pals' situation. So leave it alone.
I am being cold is it? Well yes I am. But its not about being cold, its about being sensible and preserving whatever little sanity you might have left.
Getting over Ex was one of the hardest things I ever had to do. And Im not about to undo all of that. So this is it. The Ex is blacklisted from my thoughts and my blog.
A heavy heart and a single tear...
5 comments:
over a 5 year relationship in 5 months..that IS something. go girl! i wish you good luck for a fresh start.
:) smile smile. cheers and good luck
You've done something I could never bring myself to do... And thats good for you coz 'being friends' is just about the stupidest thing.. coz somewhere or the other the resentment and hurt are bound to show up.. or the other person may not get a chance to fully get over the relationship.. so what you've done is brave and the right thing to do... cheers to you!
you're not really writin much, gig queen.
@ nithya
thx for the props...im trying my best :)
@ moonie
cheerios...another one for the road
@ ruchika
i don't know bout brave and all but it sucks being me right now.
@ jerry
the gig queen is so engrossed in said gigs that her job has taken over her life and mind space, but she will get active soon :)
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