Life is a crazy 'comedy of errors' at times. My assumed identity S.I.M has been M.I.A for the past month and a half and my mind has been wiped clean, hence the no writing bit.
When one goes through tragic/life-altering moments, your mind goes into shock and there are no thoughts, views or opinions... Just a strange inquisitiveness. Why me? You ask yourself. It's not self-pity, neither wallowing in misery... It's merely a lack of zest and want. Completely devoid of emotion, good or bad, I have been floating through life rather aimlessly.
Or so I thought. During this wandering, I have managed to sleep walk my way through a more than satisfactory raise, a very eventful birthday, a close pal's wedding planning and also found someone capable of bringing a smile to my face everyday. Yet there is a strange yearning. Of something lost, or of something never found. And I have realized that I am the sort of person who can give up things easily... There seems to be nothing that I need to stick with or cling to for comfort. The most recent case in point being alcohol. Now some, ok lots of people turn to these 'spirits' for some upliftment. I used to be one of those. There was no amount of sleep deprivation, bad hair days, relationship blues or work woes that a JD and coke or a Vodka OJ couldn't solve and then one fine day, a month ago, I decided to stop. Just like that.
Some might call it depression. I don't. It is what it is. A general lull in life and I know everyone goes through it. And this too shall past. S.I.M will be back again baby!
9 comments:
This is so weird. We even have the same template!
lol! will watch your space :)
Have already "favorited" you!
Word "Denial" comes to mind. You seek something very much but not willing to work towards it....everything else in life is mute.
*Wearing a shrink hat*
K
Its easy for you to give up things - thats a very nice thing to be able to do I'd say :)
Waiting to hear more about that someone who buys u a smile everyday and also about the eventful birthday. The wishes if I send now would be too late, isn't it. ;-)
Keep scribbling, we're reading..
I know what you mean about the lull in life. It's like life is running on auto pilot and nothing seems to have a point ..
maybe I'm taking out some of my own yearnings/frustrations .. dunno if you're going through any of the same stuff ... but yes I too tell myself the same thing everyday - this too shall pass...
@ serendipity
thanks :P
@ anonymous
Mr. Shrink, is there a reason why you choose to stay in the shadows...while passing such insightful judgement on my state of being. and just to answer it: I am not in 'Denial' but I am yearning for something which I have made pretty clear in my writings...
@ prasoon
cheers to that dude! I finally downed a few last night after much persuasion from a pal celebrating his birthday...but I do know I can not do it just as easily. Keep reading, I'll keep writing :)
@ nutty
that is exactly how I feel...life is running on auto-pilot. But this too shall pass girl, for both you and me ;)
whats MIA?
oh... ok!!
i was reminded of a more exciting possibility... uma thurman from pulp fiction!...
@ crimson
haha! i wish ;P nah, its plain old simple MIA
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